February 24, 2006

Land Before Time XXV: Lost in New York City

It's Movie Review Time! Today we'll be looking at the smash hit, "Land Before Time...." blah blah blah you know the name of it - it's too long to keep writing, so just look at the title.

Just when you thought the multicultural adventure were over, think again! Chica, the South-Central American Wombat and Joser, the Pacific Islander Rapter (his Sea-Parent is Nishi) find themselves trapped in New York City... with Mary Kate and Ashley Olson! Wow! Here's what happened: While on a city tour, the two best friends and sea parent decided to go to a broadway show! Once there, they met up with Mary Kate and Ashley, their two best friends from back home... but when Mary kate (Ashley's best friend!) saw the show was about eating disorders, she started crying, and walked out. Her totally tiny sister, Ashley (Mary Kates best friend! Totally!) decided that to make her feel better, they would go shopping and then let paperazzi take pictures of them standing really really close together and not eating. Wow!

To make the adventures even Ashlier and MaryKatielier, they find their new friends, Krem and Krey, two snakes who exercise their alternative lifestyle choices by attaching fake arms and legs and demanding to be treated with ressssssspect! Wow! How totally trendy and acceptable! Having arrived back from the dessert, where they "found themselves" the two are now adopting, and picketing the streets of New York for a state-accepted legal marriage. Anyway, after the first six hours where Krey is complaining about how his father is coming to town and he wants his father to think he is OK and accept him (like every plot of every movie that has come out in the past 6 years) Krem meets another snake, Jake, and they decide to make a movie that no one will see yet will win every award ever invented.

As the movie wraps up, we find the entire group led in song by MK and A, singing the ever-popular tunes, "Neutral G Love" and "Acceptable Me". He are the words:

"The changing sunset reminds me ever more clearly,
ever, ever,
Of how you may change,
but I will never stop loving you,
because the moon and sun and stars deny no one,
the right to see their shining light,
shining through the night,
shining oh so bright,
shining away my fright,
shining away the bites,
and the mites,
so I can wear my tights."

The End.

(1 out of 1,093 Stars; Bert and Ernie)